MONTEZUMA'S REVENGE A.K.A.--MEXICO

Super cute monkey.
He likey, likey Beauzer. My hat that I bought that lasted only 8 hours until I lost it at the pool later that night.
The jungle ride, and were still happy.
Crazy animal! It was following me sooo scary, it almost bite Beau's toe.

Ahhh...Mexico a much needed trip for relaxation. We went with my two sisters and their husbands near the Cancun area and we had a great time until....DUN, DUN, DUN--MONTEZUMA'S REVENGE!! I'm just going to say to my beloved readers near, far, where ever you are, you may never read again because this is gettin' graphic. So there's your warning. The week started out great, except for the dude I was sitting next to on the plane, kept farting SBD'S! I was completely disgusted and Beau refused to trade me seats-jerk! The dude crop dusted at least three rows ahead and three rows behind I know, because my sister and brother and law smelt it but they never delt it. The resort we stayed at was beautiful. Beau was our awesome translator and one of the first things he asked was if it was agua purificada-which we were told yes of course. I myself nor Beau were still willing to believe it so when we got to our room, I read the hotel information which I always do so I know what the cable channels are. Anyway it said all water potable. "Beau what does "potable" mean?" "I don't know" "Well I'm not drinking the water then" So neither of us did. We used bottled water to brush our teeth. The next morning we went a different employee and asked if the water was good and she said NO!! So, we walked over the my sisters' room and said nobody drink the water. Stephanie looks up and says "What? You said it was ok, I drank 2 glasses already!" My response to her twirling my finger in a circle, "Number one rule, never trust a Mexican" I was kidding of course. So a few days pass, we went snorkeling, swimming in the 85 degree ocean, shopped, normal vacation stuff. One side note, it was the best snorkeling ever! We snorkeled with stingrays, baracudas, turtles, were surrounded by hundreds of colorful fish that were totally bumping us. I screamed several times underwater. Oh yeah, Becky and I were also being followed very closely by a reef shark! Hello! Good thing I watched shark week and how not to become shark bait. Becky on the other hand, did not, wearing a bright yellow bikini-total shark bait material. So thank you Becky for attracting a shark to us! So by day three, Montezuma's revenge had raveged Beau, then I was in for it next, then Nathan and finally Brian. The girl who actually drank the water was not affected in the least. So a few of my days were crap-literally or Mexican stew as Brian named it. We had a theme song by the late, great Johnny Cash--"Burnin' Ring of Fire", and here are a few of my favorite quotes from the trip: Brian-"Mexico pisses my off! (When he went to get $200.00 dollars out the ATM and only got $20.00 with a $5.00 trans. fee, then had to do it again.) Mine-"Mexico can have my butthole, but it will never take my soul!" It is to be said kind of like Scarlett O'Hara from Gone with the Wind. (When we were driving in a tropical storm in the middle of the jungle with one of our cars on fumes.) All in all we had a great trip. One more funny thing, on the airplane ride home guess who I was sitting by? That's right SBD! So when an irate father and son demanded they sit together, Beau and I were all to happy to oblige. We then got sat down by an irate lady who did not want to sit by us and she had two dogs under her seat that snarled at my feet as I tried to pass by. Then she farts, and Beau whispers to me "Great, we move from one fart cloud to another." Hilarity!